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All Your Own Stunts; Medium Quest Complete.
Topic Started: May 5 2009, 04:51 PM (218 Views)
perfectchaos0z
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King of Thieves
All Your Own Stunts

Difficulty: Medium

Description:
Your super powers have impressed a famed movie producer. He asks you to meet him at lunch to discuss making a movie with you as the main star. You would use your amazing abilities to dazzle the big screen with realistic images instead of that fake CGI bull-shat. After being hired you are whisked away onto set.

But it's not what you expected. Your director is a tyrant. Figure out a way to deal with his perfectionism and make a damn good movie!

Reward:+700 zeni, +5 DP, +30 all stats, +3 Rp Credits

Available: Always.
"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Thomas Jefferson
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perfectchaos0z
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"Ahh... nice to have a little martini and a break for a change." Spopovich said, sipping on his drink though a straw and leaning back in the hammick. He was at Roshi's place and taking a well deserved break after smashing some heads over at West City. Seemed like he was a bit of a local celebrity over there now, but he didn't care. As long as he didn't have to go back over there.

Roshi had laid into him about eating the supplies when he got back, but Spopovich just told him to go screw himself. He'd done it, hadn't he? Jeeze. Ryouta was pretty ticked off too, but whatever. He was watching her for pennies anyway. Man, he needed to make some cash and fast. He was running low and booze money and running errands for Roshi paid dick.

Scanning the horizon, he wondered not for the first time if that turtle would ever make it back. Whatever.

"Hey, you got a phone call, Spopovich!" Ryouta called out the window to him.

"Damn, whose ruining my Spopovich time." He complained, walking in the house and picking up the phone. "Yeah?"

"Is this Spopovich?" Said an unfamiliar voice.

"Well, it sure ain't Goku."

"Great! I'm Harvey Masterson. You may have heard of me?"

"Nah."

"Oh... well..." He sounded off-put. "I'm a famous director of action movie classics. I like big explosions in my movies, little to no plot..."

"So, your just a Captain Ersatz of Micheal Bay?" Spopovich said, leaning against the wall. Where was this going?

"Umm... anyway, I heard about your stunts in West City. I was just wondering if you wanted to meet for lunch." Harvey said, clearing his thought a little.

"You asking me on a date?"

"No, no, just meet me in Steel City in about an hour. I'm paying." Harvey said before they made their goodbyes.
"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Thomas Jefferson
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perfectchaos0z
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Free food? Spopovich was there.

"I'm going out!" He yelled to the house, heading for the door.

"B-but, your training today!" Roshi said exasperated from the bathroom, leaning out.

"Try and stop me... I'm off to hit it big." Spopovich said back, spinning to deliver his comeback, and then walking out the door and taking off into the sky.
_

It only took him a little bit to fly over to Steel City, so he took him time to screw around. Didn't look very interesting here, but oh well. First he hit the mall and whistled at some girls, who looked pretty disgusted. Then he hit the sports store and looked at some stuff, before settling for a nice brew in a 24 hour bar. By the time he was done amusing himself, looked like it was about time for Harvey to show up, so he made haste over to the meeting place.

A pencil thin man called him over when he entered the restaurant. Spopovich made sure not to order anything as soon as he saw the place. Way out of his price range. He took a seat across from the director and stared at him, giving him time to open.

"Well, Spopovich..." Harvey said, rubbing his hands together. "I heard about what happened in West City... and I know the stuff you do isn't faked. Its all real martial arts, so I want to make a martial arts movie staring you. I'll pay well, and you'll do your own stunts." The man pitched.

"Sounds good. I've always thought I'd be a star... although I don't think I can act for shit, ya know?" He laughed, rubbing his chin. "So I want real dudes to fight in the movie, no staged bullshit." He demanded. Spopovich was cut out for this movie star stuff. "So, whats this thing about?"
"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Thomas Jefferson
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perfectchaos0z
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Man, Spopovich thought there was going to be free food here.... but this guy was being cheap. Wasn't ordering a damn thing for him or even offering. And he was talking about this stupid ass movie.

"Anyway, you play a professional martial artists who won a tournament back in the day, but now you're washed up..." Harvey said, which elicited a growl from Spopovich. "And then you decide to join the police force as one of the few good cops, but, get this, you're a rogue cop and don't play by the rules. Okay, okay? But one day you find some crooked cops taking some bribes and drugs! They like nearly kill you before you get back to the chief while your partner escapes... and everyone thinks you dead! They run an article while meanwhile you recover with a underground connection you have. Your there for monthes while the corrupted cops take over the town with mob connections and your girl, who is also a prostitute, is... uhh..." He fumbles around for a bit. "...they, er, keep her with them! And your son, like... oh, yes, you have a son, is adopted by the... mafia boss..." He fumbles again, moving some napkins. "But when you come back, you start to re-establish yourself and call up your partner, the straightest cop on four continents, to help you out of this scrap... and you go on a kind of buddy-cop adventure to set right what once went wrong which leads to the heights of the Colombian drug cartel!" The director finished dramatically.

Spopovich just stared at him.

"And all the while..." He started up again. "There is the biggest and most expensive car chase and crash ever re-chordered WITHOUT special effects, a gun fight, a sex scene, and you playing the badass main character! I call it Vehicles Ablaze! with an exclamation point." He exclaimed, smiling.
"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Thomas Jefferson
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perfectchaos0z
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"Can I get some food." Spopovich said, putting his arms up on the table. He sighed hard and looked to the side. Damn, he was hungry.

"Oh, sure sure..." Harvey said, ordering some food and calling a waiter over. "So, what do you think?" He smiled expectantly.

I think it sucks.

"I think its awesome. I'll be the main character, looking forward to it." Spopovich said, not forgoing his chance at hitting it big. Fame, fortune, chicks, it was all in the stars for him. He smirked at his own magnificence. He knew this would be awesome. Up on the silver screen, a whole audience watching him! And he got to do his own stunts.

"Great! What are you eating?"

Spopovich ordered the most expensive thing on the menu, laughing as he did so, and digging in when it arrived. "So, what profit margin can I expect?"

"Uhh..." Harvey replied, looking confused. Did this guy expect to get by paying him peanuts?

"You don't think you're going to cheat me out of anything, do ya? I want a shitload for this." Spopovich said, his mouth full of food.

"Well... um... that's a lot of considerations, Mr...?"

"Its just Spopovich." The burly warrior replied. Shit, did he even have a last name? He couldn't remember. Screw it. He didn't want any connection to his family anyway. Bunch of good for nothing punks, who gives a fuck.

"Okay, come by the studio tomorrow." Harvey said, handing a note over to him, which had the directions and number of it on it. "One of those is my private number, okay? We'll see you then. You can meet the cast and crew and we'll even start filming tomorrow, this movie will be amazing..." The director gushed, standing up and bidding him a goodbye.

"This had better be a lot of money... cause this is going to suck."
"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Thomas Jefferson
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perfectchaos0z
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The next day, Spopovich was walking onto the set. Things looked pretty nice in Hollywood and Spopovich was going to enjoy his time here. Maybe he'd have a huge party and get totally plastered with Lindsy Lohan and then end up in rehab... could you get a ticket for drunk flying? He didn't know. Oh well, he was a star now, its not like the rules applied to him anymore.

"Yo Harvey!" Spopovich said, giving him a high five as he walked up. The director greeted him in one of his nice suits and brought him into the studio where several actors were practicing lines and people were running around, lots of cameras. There were also donuts. "Mm... donuts." He walked over to collect one while Harvey was trying to talk to him, which kind of pissed Harvey off. "Hey, I'm hungry." He offered though chewing mouthfuls.

"Okay, okay, here is the cast..." Harvey said by means of introduction. "This right here is my main man Carl Johnson, hes playing your partner in the movie." Spopovich nodded at the wiry black man and moved on. "This is Hilary Gomez, shes a former child star playing your prostitute girlfriend in the movie to prove shes not a kid anymore." Spopovich stared at her for a minute.

"Shes legal?" He asked, to laughter from Harvey. He never answered him.

"This is Shawn Jacobs, hes playing your affable nemesis in the movie." Spopovich shook the older gentleman's hand before following Harvey. He met some more of the cast and crew and some more of the cast were mostly washed up actors. Too bad. He wanted to meet some real celebrities.

"Guess this makes me the biggest actor here." Spopovich smirked, deliberating ignoring all the other bigger ones. He flexed a bit and picked up his script, glancing over it. "Hmm.... my name in this movie is Gibson Walker. That sounds vaguely familiar..." He mumbled to himself, reading his lines.
"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Thomas Jefferson
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perfectchaos0z
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"Quiet on the set, we're filming the first scene!" Harvey's voice sounded out over the gathered masses. They fixed up some of Spopovich's makeup and stuff before sending him out to the scene. He had to sit at his bar, and record some lines....
_

The night is burning hot as I'm sitting in a crappy bar in a bad part of town. I'm sipping cheap pissbeer out of a dirty glass and thinking about my some odd years of protecting... and serving... and you know the rest. Seems like every cop I come across is a crooked one in this town... some cops on the take and I aim to stop them.

"Hey mista." A thug says from behind Gibson, causing him to glance behind him from his position at the bar. "You'd better give us all your money." He continues, deliberating picking the most dangerous looking guy in the bar for some reason. And the most pissed off.

"Its all in the bank." Gibson says, taking another swig of his beer. "You guys better not fuck with me." He grumbles.

The thugs then proceed to jump on him, one of them breaks a pool stick over his back but Gibson jumps up- and takes them down pretty easy, considering they fall before he hits them.

"What the fuck- I wanted a real fight!" Gibson shouts for some reason, picking the guys back up and punching them after they go down.
_

"Cut, cut, cut!" Harvey shouted, making Spopovich drop the guy he was holding.

"What?" Spopovich said, pulling his shirt. He wasn't used to wearing stuff like this.

"You can't just beat on the actors!"

"I requested real fights... so get it done!" Spopovich yelled back, walking over to grab another donut. Maybe they'd just some actual martial artists in here or something. Nah, probably just more actors. Whatever, he was getting paid.
"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Thomas Jefferson
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perfectchaos0z
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"Okay, okay, get set up, we're filming the next scene... we're skipping ahead a bit to the car chase, okay?" Harvey said with an exasperated sigh. "We're closing off some of Steel City for this scene, don't go out of the designated signs..."
_

Officer Gibson Walker spotted a gang of crooks running off in a car, so him and his partner, Marcus Lowrey jumped in their GTX car with a brand name slapped on it.

"What..." Gibson muttered, not sure how to take this obvious selling ploy, but starting up the car and chasing them down. He speed up after him, growling as he chased them. Some other cars showed up and tried to run him off the road, but he chased back against him.

"You fucking crazy man, CRA-ZY!" The black partner yelled, looking like he was about to try and escape.

"Uhh, its what the script says." Gibson replied, slamming against the cars and speeding up in his car. "Screw this- this car is way too slow." He said suddenly, speeding up after the car in front made a huge jump on a well placed ramp. Gibson burst from the car suddenly and started to fly after the other car, causing everyone to freak out. Gibson grabbed the car out of mid-air..
_

"Cut, cut, cut!" Harvey shouted, standing up. "How are you... I heard you could but... no flying! That is way too unbelievable to my audiences!" He said, pointing at him. "You're just supposed to take a lot of punishment in this movie."

"But that car was way too slow." Spopovich said, setting the car down.

"Don't say that! Do you know whose funding this project? Jesus!" Harvey yelled at him, throwing his script down and walking off. "I'll be in my trailer!" He yelled, slamming the door.

"Whats his problem?" Spopovich asked though mouthfuls of another donut.
"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Thomas Jefferson
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perfectchaos0z
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Harvey sat slouched in his chair sighing. "We need more explosions in this movie..." He mumbled to himself, seemingly making more things up in the script. "Okay, skipping ahead, we're doing the sex scene next!" He called out.

"Wha..?"
_

Gibson Walker slowly peeled off his shirt in the dirty hotel room and there before him lay Felicity Jasmines, a beautiful ruby if he ever saw one. The rippled sweating...
_

"Cut! Maybe we should use a more attractive actor for this part?" Harvey asked, looking around.

"What? I'm Spopovich, girls love baldies!" Spopovich said, looking pretty ticked off.

"I'm for that..." Hilary Gomez said, but winced when Spopovich glared at her.

"Action! Lets just do it." The director said, leaning back in his chair.
_

Gibson Walker (still played by Spopovich) peeled off his shirt once more and advanced on the girl in the bed, he striped down to just his underwear and was filmed only from the waist up while she got totally topless and they kissed each other lightly, like Hollywood kisses, not real kisses...
_

"Cut!"

"You can't say cut, only I can say cut!" Harvey looked pretty pissed.

"I don't even get to have sex with her?" Spopovich complained from the bed.

"Eww, no." Hilary said, wincing again, eying Spopovich scaredly.

"No, Spopovich, baby, its a simulated sex scene. Do you want this movie being NC-17? That would be a death sentence!" Harvey yelled at him, standing and looking totally at the end of his rope.

"But I still see her tits." Spopovich contested, reaching over to do inappropriate things which earned him a smack and another call of scene for today. There was some yelling, and everyone finally decided just not to include a sex scene. Also, Hilary got a restraining order against Spopovich and won't return his calls.

"Damn woman... we had sex once." Spopovich complained to himself, setting the phone down. "Or something. Whatever." He chuckled, eating another donut.
"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Thomas Jefferson
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perfectchaos0z
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"To replace some of the scenes you ruined, Spopovich, and the cutting out of the sex scene, we're making the fight scene extra long... okay? Now, your motivation is anger... these guys are some of the main baddies best henchman and he is just past that door, okay? This is after the part in the movie where he just killed your partner, that black guy, on his last day of the job because he was helping you. Action!"

_

"Marcus Lowrey dies in this movie?" Gibson asked himself, as several thugs came rushing out. "Alright..." He smirked to himself, as one pulled out a gun and shot... rubber bullets at him.
_

"Cut! Is this some sort of insult?" Spopovich yelled. "I said real stuff all the way!"

"Real bullets?" Harvey gulped, looking unsure.

"Yeah, do it! I can take it..." Spopovich shot back, smirking... he had to sign a non-suing agreement, ruining his backup plan, but then it was back to the scene.
_

Gibson grabbed the guy that shot him and threw him for a loop while some other guys ran out, and Gibson beat the hell out of them. They couldn't lay a finger on him, although he did break a whole lot of them. Curiously, he didn't fight any other people with guns, but whatever. Some people with chains though, which he grabbed and beat them with...
_

"Cut, cut, cut! Do you have to be so rough? All those guys are probably going to sue us now!" Harvey yelled, gesturing at the people laying around.

"Should have made them sign an agreement." Spopovich said, walking over to get another donut.

"And stop eating those! Gibson is not eating a donut in this scene!"

"He is now." Spopovich said though chewed up mouthfuls, walking over and drop-kicking some poor guy actor he had already beat down. "Its your poor decisions making this movie not work out."

"Stop, we're not doing the scene... What, but, ahhh!"
"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Thomas Jefferson
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perfectchaos0z
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Gibson groaned in pain as a hammer was brought down against his foot, hard. For real. They were doing the torture scene, and the actor was using his supreme toughness to get effort during it. They were going to beat him hard and then smash his toes or-
_

"Cut, cut, cut! Okay... this movie isn't doing so great." Harvey confessed from his directors chair. "I've got some ideas that will definitely expand our audience, okay, ready to hear them?!"

"What?" Spopovich said from his tied up place in the chair.

"First, we're not going to use this torture scene... too graphic for kids."

"What?! But we already filmed it, that hurt... kids shouldn't be watching this anyway!"

"But they will watch it, so we have to make concession for them. In fact, I'm going to cut out most of the graphic sex and violence and try and go for a PG-13 rating."

Spopovich had heard a lot of bad ideas from the director over the course of this movie, and stuff that it seemed like he was making up on the fly... but this was just the worst.

"Yeah, yeah, expand our teen audience... oh! Expand into our teenage GIRL audience, because, in this next scene... okay, this idea is original... you get reverted to a teenage form! So we can have a hot main character and still use your fight scenes, okay? I was thinking Zac Efron for your younger self..."

"What!?" Spopovich yelled, getting up from the chair, breaking the ropes.

"What? Its cool, Zac Efron is some kind of money-making machine and he will work for me! Now, get set up for the next scene- we're going to include those scenes of you flying, okay? Because, now, listen to this, in this scene- you decide to become a superhero! Superhero movies are big budget things now, money-makers, and it'll throw the audience for a loop!"

"That is the worst idea I have ever heard!" Spopovich growled at him.

"No, your just jealous of my artistic vision! I am the only genius in this business right now, you understand me?! I am not some hack like Micheal Bay, I am a fucking genius!" Harvey said, laughing manically. "And I'm paying you."
"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Thomas Jefferson
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perfectchaos0z
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"I am Captain Amazing!" Gibson said, landing outside a bank vault where apparently some thugs were robbing it.

"Oh no, its Captain Amazing, lets shoot our AGE-RAY at him!"
_

"Gah, this is just so horrible!" Spopovich said, landing. He rubbed his temples. His conscious and good taste couldn't let him do this movie anymore.

"No, no, see for this next scene- you burst into the bank vault to stop these guys, okay? Go!" Harvey director, smiling like... he was destroying the movie industry.
_

Captain Amazing burst into the bank vault, destroying it totally and finding it full of money.
_

"Huh?" Spopovich said, looking around as Harvey and some guys went into the bank and started bringing out bags of cash. "Whats going on?" The burly warrior said, eying them with some suspicion. Did they really think he was as stupid as he looked?

"Oh nothing, we're just, uhh... taking this cash so we can film another scene with it, and... you stay here while we take it and... do some improv, that is what this movie needs, improv, and random video game scene... yes..." Harvey said, his smile very wide.

"I... don't think so. Wait a minute, are you actually stealing this money under my nose?" Spopovich asked, smirking. Harvey had no answer. "And this whole movie thing was just a bad plot to steal some real money, and wasn't actually made for anyone- you just made it up on the spot to steal money, right?!" Spopovich smiled. "Yes! I have to believe that for my sanity..." He mumbled, watching as Harvey got into his car and started to drive off with the cash.

Spopovich, of course, flew after him, humming do-do-do-da-do-do, and smashed into his car, then proceeded to beat him most savagely, and he wasn't too proud to stuff some of the bank cash into his own pockets either. Lucky, that part wasn't caught on camera, but the rest of the scene was...
"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Thomas Jefferson
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perfectchaos0z
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Well, Spopovich had a short career in movies... but it didn't turn out so well. The whole thing degenerated into a plot by Harvey Masterson to steal some money. It started out as legitimate, but he spent too much money on random explosions and too many people got injured, and some of the actors wanted too much money. He was going to try and make it terrible after that, to exploit some loophole in the industry where you get more money if you make a bad movie, but they fixed that before filming was done... so the only way to turn a profit was to turn to crime.

Spopovich was reading all this in a nice little magazine detailing it all, but leaving his name out of it. He didn't get paid for his work, and he didn't get any fame for it either.

"What a useless waste of my life..." He muttered to himself, drinking some coffee and eating a donut he actually paid for with his meager earnings. It wasn't as good as free back-stage donuts, either. Nothing tasted as good as Hollywood.

The movie had gone on to go to the final print anyway, done entirely by an aspiring intern. They used scenes of him doing things on and behind the scenes, and made catching the bank robbers (played by Harvey and his gang) the final scene. It was a pretty big flop, but was a decent popcorn action flick. And Spopovich didn't see a cent from it.

"Screw the movies. Reality is better anyway." Spopovich said firmly, not even realizing the irony as he floated into the sky. "Guess I'll go back to Roshis... wonder if I can get a free copy of Vehicles Ablaze!?" He wondered aloud, before streaking off into the sunset. His work here was done.
"All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent." - Thomas Jefferson
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