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The End Of The Beginning; Personal Roleplay (complete)
Topic Started: Jan 13 2012, 01:04 AM (172 Views)
Aya
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When are we eating?
Ayakon hovered in place just over one of the taller buildings in a city near Frost's palace. He'd been doing fantastic up until very recently. He'd worked towards his own needs, no matter the results and had, for the most part, not given a second thought to the consequences. Until now. He'd murdered at least six people in cold blood, he'd killed when he didn't exactly need to. But he could no longer hold back the questions that violated his consciousness. His reaction to solving the problem of a potential revolt, combined with his recent sparing of that ambassador had driven him to question exactly what he wanted.

I could have killed that ambassador, I could have disposed of that child and made off with quite a tidy little profit. I should have done it. I should have disposed of Roark myself without a second thought, I had every right and certainly the ability. But I damned well didn't. He closed his eyes and tried to concentrate. A little meditation in the frosty air would help. It had before. He peered at the gray tinge of his own lids and tried to clear his thoughts. He couldn't, of course. There was something that remained, even when all other things left.

Those eyes. That child's innocent eyes. They would not leave his mind. He had mercilessly killed up until this point and he knew that he would have to kill more in the future. But a child... a child stopped him dead in his tracks. There is no way a child would stop Frieza or Cooler. It was unlikely a child would stop any of the Saiyans he'd fought. But it had stopped him. This was simply not how a Changeling was supposed to act. This was not how Frost acted, not how the Cold clan acted, and so nor should the Brumal clan. Not if he wanted to rise in status, to give his family the honor it so deserved. And that was the entire reason he was doing this, wasn't it?

Wasn't it?

WC: 344
"I want interaction but this is going to be a real battle, possibly to the death depending on how it goes." -Revan, on Aya.
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Aya
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When are we eating?
With little regard for anyone in the building below him, or anyone in the city, he let out a shout of frustrated fury, his ki spiking sharply as he did. Not that there was very much power to spike, granted, but the gesture spoke more than the results. His fists clenched, muscles tightening and he glared at the darkness of the sleeping city. He could feel himself slipping towards his newly gained transformation and was forced to calm himself down, so as not to lose control. Things would have to change. He would have to lose these hesitant moments. He would have to be able to kill as a member of the Planet Trade Organization would. He decided he would suppress that moment, these instances of mercy and he would--

His mind would not let this lie go through. He shut his eyes and thought back to the week before, These two events were not the only instance. I have killed out of mercy before. I foresaw Zornak's agonizing death. His years slow, endless torture in tournament after failed tournament, until one day... His eyes flitted back and forth beneath their lids as he saw images of his mental soliloquy, ... until one day someone made sport of killing him just so that those barbarians could get a rise out of the crowd. Breaking his neck saved him a very slow impaling on one of those accursed spikes, or an agonizingly drawn-out roasting, as if he were a stuck beast, by some monster's ki vicious blast. I, Ayakon of the Brumal clan, saw all of this before I even stepped into the ring with him and that is why he was dispatched of so quickly. I did for him what no one before or after would do, and truly freed him of his imprisonment. There is no greater mercy. Doing the wrong thing for the right reasons... is it still doing the wrong thing? His lids tightened as he struggled with the internal question until he could hold it in no longer.

WC: 341
TWC: 685
"I want interaction but this is going to be a real battle, possibly to the death depending on how it goes." -Revan, on Aya.
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Aya
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When are we eating?
"Damn it all to Hell!" His eyes flashed opened and his ki wavered beneath him, so great was his frustration. Only through a pause in all other things and deep concentration could he manage to keep afloat. Even his mastery of flight was not immune to these challenges he was facing.

Again, with no regard to whoever could overhear or would be bothered by his announcement, he declared aloud to the city, "I cannot continue this! I will show no more mercy. I am Ayakon of the Brumal clan. I am a Changeling, I will be among the greatest, and I will not do this by being weak and merciful!" He empowered himself anew and flew back towards his quarters. 

He had to forget about all this mercy nonsense. He had another training session with Lord Frost in the morning. Then, if he was released from his drills early, he would dismiss all of these doubts by finding a tavern he hadn't been kicked out of and having a nice drink. Or six. He was certain he wouldn't be visiting the guardsmen anytime soon, nor would he ever pay a visit to that police station. He couldn't afford to keep connections with these lower class Changelings. They were infecting him with their feelings. He would stop caring about anything that had happened before, and he would ignore any advice that didn't advantage him. That was the way to go and it seemed that he would repeat it in his mind until he believed it.

On his way back home, he could not stop it. Overlord Seta's words echoed in his mind, "...If anything our emotions help us to become better than we were..."

He shook his head and forced those events, and specifically her comments, out of his mind. He would shake himself of this disgusting habit. Comments from a Saiyan, even one of such high status, had limited value to him. He was a Changeling. And damn it all he was determined to act like one. There was no other way. No other way.

WC: 345
TWC: 1030
"I want interaction but this is going to be a real battle, possibly to the death depending on how it goes." -Revan, on Aya.
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