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Old Friends and Crabby Teachers; PSaga
Topic Started: Sep 4 2014, 07:57 PM (108 Views)
Marek
Member Avatar
Winter is Coming
Ice sat in the dim light of the tavern. He was doing his best to look unassuming, but wasn’t having much success.

A human walked by his table holding a large tankard of dark beer, he exclaimed, “HOLY SHIT IT’S AN ALIEN!”

Ice nodded politely to acknowledge the man. He then took a large gulp from the beer he had ordered from the barkeep.

Another human walked by, he had a rather odd haircut:


Posted Image


He literally threw his hands up into the air and shouted, “OH MY FUCKING GOD! I SO TOTALLY CALLED THIS! MUST…GET…TO WORK! MUST TELL ALL ABOUT THE ALIENS!”

The man then ran out of the bar at a hurried pace.


Huh, they must not get many aliens on this planet. Strange though, I know the Changeling race told a bunch of humans to build giant pyramids once just as a joke to see if they’d do it. We still can’t believe they did it.

Other humans had gathered around now, watching Ice drink his beer and watch TV. He didn’t like the feeling of being watched, but, he didn’t want to make a scene.

The initial human’s curiosity wasn’t sated, he piped up again, “HOLY SHIT! Never thought I’d see an alien. When I tell the Discovery Channel about this I’ll get a free cable subscription for life! What brings you to Earth bud?”

Ice had studied the behavior of the customers of this establishment at some length. He thought he had just the right response in mind to sate the human’s curiosity and get him to leave. Ice said, “Hey, I’m just trying to watch the game.” Ice pointed to a television set where men were tackling and hitting each other throwing an oblong brown ball around. He wasn’t quite sure what was going on, but, it was entertaining enough.

The human laughed, “Sure thing, bet they don’t have the game in space.”

Ice nodded and took another sip of beer. The human sauntered off to his seat.

Several minutes later…


The soft click clack of hard leather soles slapping against the hard linoleum floor filled the bar and then stopped. Ice turned around. Finally, they’re here.

He had needed help for this most recent job as it was incredibly time sensitive. And his help had just arrived, a female human and a male Saiyan.

The female human, Ella, was a fierce creature to behold. Her temper was as fiery as her crimson red hair and she had a hair trigger on her battle rifle. In all his years traveling the outer rim Ice had never met a better shot with a rifle. She was one of the individuals in the galaxy he’d actually call a friend.

Ice didn’t really know The Saiyan Belpepa’s story. But, they had worked together in the past and had developed a mutual respect for each other. They had a long standing agreement that if the one of them was ever in a bind they could ask the other for help, no questions asked.

Ice nodded at his comrades, “I’m glad you’re here. We need to get started sooner rather than later. We’re on the fucking clock here people.” Ice slapped a round metallic device into the palm of Ella’s hand. He did the same for Belpepa.

“But, before we get started, I need to share just a bit of background…”

Quote:
 

Ice loomed over the elder. He had him chained to the ground with bits of his own energy. He had been questioning the man for some time but to his credit the elder remained steadfast in his resolve.

“WHERE IS THE SCROLL!” Ice shouted at the top of his lungs.

The elder ignored him.

Ice glowered, To hell with this. Ice placed the palm of his hand on the Elder’s forehead. The elder squirmed. Ice spoke, “Stay still. If this actually works it should only take a minute.” The elder continued to squirm anyway. Ice breathed deep and focused his energy. He shot a low amount of electricity through his arm, down his palm directly into the elder’s brain.

The elder arched his back, pulling against the chains and screamed in pain.

Ice spoke, “Tell me where the scroll is.”

The elder replied, “It’s in my house next to the…wait, I’ll never tell you!”

Ice sent another jolt of energy through his arm into the elder’s cranium.

Ice replied, “You were saying?”

The elder said, “In the davenport.”

Ice paused, he didn’t know what the fuck a davenport was.

He sent an even bigger jolt of electricity through his arm into the alien’s skull. Ice spoke, “What in the literal shit is a davenport?”
The elder’s body writhed in pain, he tried to speak but was unable to answer.

”Hmm, maybe too much voltage. But, maybe more will help!”

The elder said, “Please no!” Ice stopped what he was doing, holding his hand right above the alien’s head, a jolt of electric blue energy dancing around in his palm. He was holding his hand so that the Yaidratian would be able to see it. Ice said, “I’m listening.”

The elder explained what a davenport was. Ice shook his head back and forth in a sign of sincere disapproval. Ice spoke, “One, that’s like, the worst place ever to hide a relic sacred to your race or whatever. Second, you could have just called it a sofa, like how normal people do.”

Ice stood up and took to the skies. He could have killed the elder, but, despite the man’s attempted murder for hire he had grown somewhat fond of the man. In a couple of minutes the energy chains he had conjured up would weaken and eventually dissipate entirely. So long as a lava flow didn’t roll over him he’d be OK.

Before Ice left he walked over to the Paladin’s corpse. The man’s sword was lying next to him. Ice picked it up and inspected it. It was masterfully made, one of the best swords he had ever seen. He pressed the sword grip into the palm of his right hand, it felt like a good fit. Well, I doubt he’ll be needing it anymore.

***


Back in the Elder’s home Ice had found the scrolls in the Davenport, right where the elder had said they would be.

When he had found the scroll he had immediately unfurled it and started to read its contents. But, he hadn’t made a whole lot of progress. The language used on the scroll was some archaic form of the Yairdratian language. During the week Ice had spent on the planet he had made a point to acquire a basic understanding of the language as he had figured that the scroll would be written in the Yairdratians’ native language rather than galactic basic. But, this form of the dialect was very unfamiliar, the grammar seemed completely different and he kept coming across words that he couldn’t decipher meaning to.

It’s always something. First my ship is destroyed. Then I can’t collect on that bounty I worked months on. Then it turns out the elder was the most skilled telepath I’ve ever had the misfortune of coming across. And now, at the end of this shit sandwich of a journey the end goal is in a language I can’t fucking understand!”

Ice exhaled deeply and shut his eyes. He was letting his emotions rule him. He breathed slowly to calm himself and then opened his eyes.

OK, even if I can’t read this scroll I can still sell it to Maverick for a literal boatload of zeni. Instead of trying to read this arcane thing I could be working out a plan to steal a ship or stow away on one. And, there was mention of a fire rod or something, an inferno rod. Ya, Maverick will pay a truly insane amount of zeni for one of those and the holodisk suggested that the best way to go about actually finding a rod was to camp out in front of the fire temple. So, if I’m going to sit around and try to read this fucking thing I may as well do it there, see if I can catch anyone as they’re trying to leave or enter the temple.

But where is the temple? [/i]

***

It had taken Ice awhile but he had finally found the temple. There was a nice comfterble looking rock outside of the temple, it offered him a nice view of the door.

”OK. I can sit here and try to figure this scroll thing out while keeping an eye on the temple gates. If anyone shows up and tries to enter I can hit them with a sneak attack! Then I’ll have one hell of a payday from Maverick and I can put that zeni to use.”

Ice sat on the rock. It was cool to the touch, well insulated from the seam of magma running through the cliff face where the doors to the fire temple were carved into.

“Well, maybe all this noise about needing a rod of flame or whatever the shit it’s called to enter this temple is…wrong? Maybe I can just force the doors open. I’m sure Maverick would be interested in some of the things inside the temple, after all, not many people could have ever gone in there, could they?”

Ice rolled up the scroll he had been pondering over and walked to the imposing double wrought stone doors of the temple. He grasped the doors with both of his hands; the wrought stone was incredibly hot to the touch. He ignored the pain and pushed the doors inward as hard as he could. The doors didn’t budge, not even a single inch. Ice tightened his grip and tried to summon more strength, but, the heat had built to the point where he felt as if he were holding molten lava in each of his hands. He quickly let go of the doors and shook his hands through the air in a desperate, and probably quite odd looking, attempt to cool them down.

“Well, I guess they were right. That shit isn’t going to work.” 

Ice returned to his rocky perch and resumed his attempts to decipher the scroll. Though this time it was even harder because the searing pain lingering in the palms of his hands.

***


After hours of studying the scroll he was starting to make sense of the arcane verse. He oddly sounded out a few syllables he was unsure about. His pronunciation was so bad that several Yairdratian children walking by had a good laugh at his expense.

“URGH! If I just had access to the web or a decent translator I’d be done. BUT I REFUSE TO PAY 16 ZENI A NIGHT FOR WI-FI! THAT’S FUCKING CRIMINAL!

Ice exhaled deeply and closed his eyes. He then rhythmically inhaled and exhaled very slowly in an attempt to bring his temper under control. After a few minutes of deep breathing Ice opened his eyes and resumed reading the scroll.

Several hours later:

As difficult as this is to read it’s starting to make sense. Ice looked at several characters near the end of the scroll. This seems to be saying that I need to feel out and embrace an energy signal to use the technique. There’s no mention of whether I could just, think of a place and go there. I suppose that makes sense, if I’m traveling in a straight line it follows I’d need to more or less aim myself in the right direction. I could know that I want to go to Pefu or Frieza but not know exactly where a straight line is between my destination and where I’m facing.

Ice furrowed his brow and continued reading. I also wouldn’t know when to stop moving. If I’m traveling faster than the speed of light my eyes wouldn’t work. I see things because, in a nutshell, light bounces off of surfaces and into my eyes. If I’m moving faster than light by the time I could “see” something I’d have already moved well past it.

Ice looked a couple of lines back on the scroll. But how the hell do I “feel out and embrace an signal?” Ice touched the scouter he wore on his face. I’ve seen fighters without scouters before. The Paladins of Avalon supposedly can get a rough measure for the strength of others without using a scouter. But, members of nearly every race in the galaxy have been accepted into the paladin order at one time or another. So the skill can’t be unique to a single race, it must be able to be learned. Ice touched his scouter again. Still, I should be able to use my scouter to get a feel for where a power signature is. That should do for now while I learn the basics of this whole instant transmission thing.

A familiar voice cut through the air, breaking Ice’s concentration:

“There he is! He left me to die on the surface and he stole my scroll! He also murdered one of your brothers! Chase him down!”

Ice looked up from the scroll he had been reading. The elder he had chained to the surface of Yairdrat had apparently escaped unharmed. While Ice was somewhat relieved to see that the old man was alive and kicking he was decidedly unhappy to see six more Paladins standing round the elder, swords unsheathed and held at the ready.

Well…shit.

The Paladin closest to the elder stepped forward. He had a pale noble face and a tousle of dark ebon hair. There was a certain sadness apparent in the man’s cool steely grey eyes. Unlike the other Paladins this one wore a long crimson red cloak. The noble faced Paladin spoke, “We felt our brother’s life slip away from across the stars. We traversed the galaxy in the blink of an eye to mete out justice to you. Now you will pay for your crime.”

The noble faced Paladin cast of his crimson cloak and strode towards Ice. There was a righteous fury smoldering in the center of his once calm cool grey eyes.

As the noble faced Paladin walked towards Ice the other five Paladins fanned out in a semi circle around him but did not move to engage him.

Looks like the other five are taking up position around me and the other Paladin, probably to make me fight with the temple gates at my back and prevent me from escaping. Do they really think a single Paladin will be enough to beat me?

Ice quickly rolled up the scroll and stuffed it inside a pocket inside of his armor. Ice unsheathed the blade he had taken from the corpse of the Paladin he had killed mere hours ago. The noble faced Paladin stopped in his tracks, eyeing the blade. He looked at Ice dead in the eyes and said, “That does not belong to you. You dishonor Bertold’s memory by holding it. Drop it, now.”

Ice smiled, “Ya know, I’ve used many a sword in my day, but, I’ve never had one that felt so right, almost like it was made for me. Maybe you Bertold was destined to come to this hell scape and die at my hands, if only to deliver this sword to me.” Ice didn’t believe in fate or destiny, however, he knew that the Paladins followed a philosophy that was rather deterministic in its outlook as all the followers of Ganr were guided by his will, or some unifying force, or some other ridiculous nebulous notion. That ought to get under this guy’s skin a little. I just need to provoke him into one false move. If he makes a single mis step I can end him in the blink of an eye. Hopefully that will be enough to break the resolve of the other five, I’m not sure I could beat five Paladins at once…

The noble face Paladin’s face contorted into a mask of pure rage for the briefest of moments. 

There!

Ice dashed forward, and thrust his new sword forward in a stab aimed to impale the Paladin through the gut. The noble faced Paladin darted to his left a split second after Ice went into motion, settling down safely about ten feet away from Ice.

Shit, I didn’t even come close to hitting him. He’s packing some serious speed.

Ice glanced in the direction of the other Paladins. They were still standing stoically in their semi circular pattern.


The noble faced Paladin laughed as he walked closer to Ice, the fire in his eyes raging like a furnace, “I saw you looking about just now. Maybe you’re thinking about running, maybe you’re wondering why we haven’t fallen on you in a storm of swords. Well, trust me, there’s no doubt in my mind that you could even dream of fighting six Paladins at once and live to tell about it.” The Paladin stopped roughly five feet away from Ice and adopted a parrying stance with his blade held high over his head in a double overhand grip. The Paladin spoke somberly, “Though I assure you that I alone will be enough to mete out Ganr’s justice.”

A thought flitted through Ice’s mind, If he has a speed advantage on me I might want to take this into close quarters combat. He wouldn’t be able to swing that long sword around if we were fighting inches from each other. Then I could use sheer size and strength to overwhelm him.

The Paladin leapt into the air landing in front of Ice while performing a two handed overhead chop. Ice intercepted the strike with a parry at on offset angle. The sound of steel grating on steel filled the air as the Paladin’s blade was turned aside. But, while Ice had avoided being cleaved in two he still felt a tremendous shock move through his arms.

Whoa. This guy is stronger than he looks; if I had tried blocking that straight on the sheer force of the blow might have broken my arms or cleaved my sword in two. It’s looking like this guy might be faster and stronger than I am. Urgh! I may need to make a run for it.

The noble faced Paladin recovered his balance and thrust his sword forward in a stabbing thrust aimed at Ice’s midsection. Ice sidestepped the thrust at a forty five degree angle, shuffling his feet just in time to escape the Paladin’s lighting quick strike. As Ice shuffled his feet and twisted his torso around to avoid the Paladin’s thrust Ice opened his mouth and unleashed a ki infused shout at the top of his lungs, “YEAUP!”. The shockwave washed over the Paladin knocking him down into the dirt several yards away, tumbling end over end.


Ice smiled confidently, Well, finally. Maybe he’s not so tough after all. I wonder if I can provoke him again?

“Tell me.” Ice said as he circled around his fallen foe, “When you felt the life bleed away from your friend what else did you feel? Surely if you could sense your friend across the stars you could also sense my energy. What makes you think you stand the slightest chance of beating me?”

The noble faced Paladin pulled himself to his feet, he replied, “Experience, persistence, honor, duty, and above all else the favor of Ganr himself.” The Paladin pointed the tip of his blade towards Ice, he continued speaking, “You are powerful, quite powerful, but, raw strength is not enough to overcome me. You’ve never fought anyone like me, and after today you’ll never fight anyone ever again.”

The noble faced Paladin rushed forward. Ice studied the man’s movements, looking at the posture of his body paying particular attention to how the Paladin’s weight was distributed. His eyes drank in a sea of information, “His grip on his sword is reversed, so the number of strikes where he can go through a full range of motion are pretty limited. He’s leading with his left shoulder so he’ll probably torque around with his hips to put his body weight into the blow. He’s staying close to the ground with his sword point dragging only inches above the ground; it looks like he’ll opt for a rising diagonal slash.” Ice simultaneously made these observations and more while constantly evaluating and reevaluating what this information told him. It was a skill he had acquired through years of constant battling.

In the blink of an eye the Paladin had closed the distance to Ice and started into a rising diagonal slash aimed at Ice’s abdomen. Ice had anticipated this kind of strike based on what he had observed of the Paladin’s form and he had already begun whipping his sword around his body to parry the Paladin’s blade away from his chest.

As Ice’s sword came around his body to catch the Paladin’s blade in a cross block the Paladin turned his blade slightly. Just enough to alter his upwards diagonal slash into a piercing thrust aimed for Ice’s heart.

SHIT!

Ice’s sword was out of position and he wouldn’t have time to bring it back around for another parry attempt. Ice attempted to weave his torso out of the way of the thrust, but he had set his feet to block and was caught flat footed. He fought back the urge to cry out in pain as the Paladin’s sword ripped open the hardened skin along the outside of his left arm. Still in close quarters Ice slammed his head forward into the Paladin’s skull.




Quote:
 

As Ganr’s champion stumbled backwards Ice took a good look at his left arm. There was a long cut running from his elbow to his shoulder nearly a quarter inch deep, and it hurt like hell.

I’ve had enough of this shit. This Paladin’s skill with a blade is exceptional. I could transform to try to overpower him, but, I get the feeling he has a lot of gas left in the tank. Plus those other five won’t just stand around for long. Time to cut my losses and get the hell out of here. Maverick will still pay a pretty penny for an original Scroll of Instant Transmission. Besides, I think I have an idea how to track this inferno rod down anyway.

Ice flexed his right hand, forming an orb of bone chilling ki in his palm.

I just need to buy myself a moment, maybe two.

The Paladin regained his composure and charged at him headlong, sword trailing behind his body.

That’ll do.

When the Paladin was just barely outside striking distance Ice thrust his right hand forward unleashing an icy jet of ki that stopped the Paladin dead in his tracks, freezing him in a solid chunk of ice.

Ice slow walked towards the block of ice as he gathered every last shred of his strength. He groaned as his full power boiled to the surface, his muscles exploded outwards, veines erupted all along his body and his eyes glowed a dark crimson red.  Ice softly said, “Goodbye.”

He crouched low to the ground and bent his knees.  He then thrust both of his hands outward while standing up and throwing back his head. In that same instant a circular shockwave of ki erupted from his body, racing outward in a 360 degree dome of destruction. The dome grew exponentially as it moved away from Ice. As the wave washed over the block of Ice it was shattered into a millions tiny little pieces, as was anything else caught in the blastwave.

Ice smiled viscously as he heard the five Paladins and the elder scream in terror as they were simply crushed by the hurricane of destruction he had unleashed.

He dropped the ground and gasped for air. He had just unleashed every single bit of his energy. His muscles felt like they had been shredded to ribbons, his lungs felt like they were on fire, and he was on the razor’s edge of passing out from sheer over exertion.

He took several deep breaths and wearily stood up. He was shaking a bit but his strength was slowly coming back to him. He looked around to make sure the attack had finished everyone off. If anyone just barely managed to survive I need to find them and finish them off. If someone took that full force and is still in fighting shape I’m going to be in deep trouble.

Ice surveyed the devastation. Impressively enough the fire temple gates had been only slightly dented inward. However, everything else as far as his eyes could see had been crushed into pieces. Ice let out a sigh of relief and then laughed. He spoke aloud to himself, “Well, so much for that Paladin beating me by himself! Gotta love running into an opponent who’s capable but also overconfident! Still it’s time to leave this planet. If these Paladins could find me more could follow. I might even need to lay low for a bit on some backwater moon or something…what a shit show this job has been.”



Belpepa slammed his glass down on the table and waved at the barkeep. “So, is that it? You wanted to brag about killing a few insufferable plate wearing monks? We’ve all been there and done that. In fact I’d hazard to say it’s something of a hobby of mine. But, what the fuck man, get to the point. You tell us this favor we’re doing you is time sensitive. I think your exact words were, ‘time is of the essence’.” Belpepa said in a mocking imitation of Ice’s voice. He stopped mid rant and looked down at the table, he pointed at the metallic disks Ice had handed to Ella and Belpepa, “ And, what the fuck are these things?” Belpepa said as he wildly gesticulated to the rounded metallic object on the table.

Ice smiled a bit, Belpepa was always fond of getting to the point and getting the job done. It was one of the reasons he appreciated working with him. Ice replied, “I appreciate your urge to hop to work, but, I’m not telling this story for fun there’s some need to know info here.”

Ella had been drumming her fingers on the table this entire sign, a classic sign of impatience amongst humans. She interrupted, “Well, the kid’s right. If there’s need to know info just tell us. Don’t slow roll us with all this buildup.”

Ice was getting just a touch annoyed with his comrades now, but, they were helping him out of a tight spot, so the least he could do was be polite. Ice replied, “I’ll get to it, soon, then you’ll see why I provided the background. The context here is rather important.”

Ice took a large gulp of beer, sat his tankard down on the table and waved at the barkeep to grab him another drink.

OK, if you will I need to share just one more little detail…


Belpepa and Ella looked at Ice with rapt attention. Ice inhaled and then exhaled deeply, ‘I hope they actually believe this. I’m still not quite sure I believe what actually happened and I was there…’

Quote:
 


Ice slowly walked through the shattered remnants of the once idyllic geo thermal garden that had surrounded the gates to the fire temple. As far as he could tell there were no Yairdrats lived anywhere near here.

While I’m glad that I don’t have any blood on my hands unnecessarily…I may have needed to pull out the same move anyway. That guy had me backed into a corner, I’ve only ever met two or maybe three men as good with a blade as that Paladin was. And I just used about every single bit of energy I could muster. Had he survived that I’d be in dire straits right about now.

Ice thought for a moment about the Paladin’s noble face. It was all too easy to forget that the people he fought, hauled into a crime lord’s den for a bounty, or - on grim occasions like this one – killed were fathers, brothers and sons of others. Was it really justifiable to snuff out so many to preserve himself?

Ice inspected what remained of the Paladins and the Yairdratian Elder, no flesh or bone was present, they had been crushed and then burned to ashes. ‘These people had families, friends. What do I have? My father and brothers cast me out, disowned me, all but sentenced me to die alone on a cold barren world.’

Ice pulled a plain looking medallion out of his armor. It was smooth on all of its surfaces and looked rather unexceptional. Ice opened up the medallion, the front of the medallion swung open on a small hinge, so expertly crafted that it wasn’t really visible unless you already knew it was there. Inside was a picture of his mother, Snow.

He felt a bit of liquid well up in his left eye, his chest felt tight.
He wiped his eye with his free left hand and returned the locket to the inside of his armor. ‘I risked my life to save this when that  smuggler tried to blow me to bits. I might not have anyone in my life now. But, I did…once. She wouldn’t just want me to roll over.

Ice clenched his hands into fists, ’And it would dishonor her memory to not defend myself. If anyone gets in my way they won’t be long for this world!’ Then again…I could probably find a line of work that doesn’t always lead to… Ice surveyed the devastation he had wrought, ‘this.’

As Ice turned to leave he felt an irresistible force grab at his left ankle and squeeze it with bone shattering strength.

Ice twisted around reflexively, the Paladin was still alive!

The Paladin had been burned to the point where his skin had either been burnt clean off of his body or was blackened completely, parts of his body were crushed nearly flat, and his once noble face was barely recognizable.

With a titanic effort Ice shook free of the man’s grip. He shouted, “No! This isn’t possible!”

The immolated Paladin coughed and smirked, or he would have smirked if he still had lips to smirk with.

Ice thrust his left hand forward and fired dozens upon dozens of neon green blasts of ki into the immolated Paladin’s face. After nearly fifteen seconds of continued rapid fire the ground had been pummeled to the point where a deep trench had formed in the earth. Ice was satisfied that even some one with the freakish ability to survive his full powered nuclear shockwave attack while trapped in a solid block couldn’t have held off the last assault.

Laughter filled the air.

Ice’s eyes opened wide, his muscles trembled, a bead of sweat rolled down his forehead and a single thought raced through his mind, This isn’t possible!

The Paladin floated out of the trench. Where the Paladin’s skin had been charred and burnt just moments before there was normal hued flesh. All of the Paladin’s injuries seemed to have healed. Ice wondered for a moment if he had even hurt the man, but, Ice could plainly see that the man’s armor and clothes had been completely destroyed.

Ice had dealt with some very odd people in his time in the outer rim, but this one was quickly becoming the strangest. Ice fought the desire to step backwards and held his ground. Ice’s eyes narrowed to slits, he looked the noble faced Paladin in the eye and said, “Just what exactly are you?”

The Paladin surveyed the battlefield, he looked back at Ice, “I see that little bit of theatre left even more of my comrades blood on your hands. Trust me that I will you suffer for that.”

Ice glowered, “Answer me fool. I saw you die!”

The Paladin nodded, “Yes, yes you did. But, funny thing. Remember a moment ago when I said you’ve never fought anyone like me before?” The Paladin grinned, “It wasn’t a boast.” The noble faced Paladin touched down on the ground and slowly walked towards Ice. “You see, I am unlike any other, I can be broken, crushed, burned but I’ll always bounce back at one hundred percent strength.” The Paladin stopped about five feet in front of Ice and grinned from ear to ear, “I…am immortal.”

‘Immortal!? That’s impossible; this prick has got to be lying.’

The Paladin stared Ice down, “And, if my senses are correct your power level just dropped like a stone. My sword was destroyed in your attack, but, don’t worry, I’m just as good with my hands.” The Paladin adopted a fighting stance Ice had never seen before, “Your time is at an end, I suggest you prepare yourself for Ganr’s judgment.”

Ice swore under his breath. His body was still worn out from the unrelenting assault he had unleashed just a moment ago. If he clashed with the Paladin now he’d be obliterated.

“Wait!” Ice said as the Paladin slow walked towards him. Ice’s mind was racing now, ’If I can buy myself a couple of seconds I should be able to muster enough strength to subdue him and escape. I just need to keep him talking.

“You’ve…” Ice clenched his hands into fists, “You’ve won. I barely have enough energy left to stand. Which means I don’t have a shot in hell of taking you on while you’re at full strength.”

The Paladin continued his slow march forward, crushing the volcanic soil under his naked feet. “Well, you don’t exactly need a genius to see that.” The Paladin stopped mere inches in front of Ice’s face. The Paladin pointed to the ground and growled, “KNEEL!” A cool rage crept into the Paladin’s voice, “Kneel and I will consider taking mercy upon you by granting you a swift and dignified end.”

“WAIT!” Ice exclaimed urgently, holding his hands in the air as a sign of surrender. “Please, please tell me about Ganr. Where I come from Ganr isn’t worshipped, he isn’t even known. If what you say is true…and I think it must be since this Ganr made you immortal, the least you can do is help me prepare for what’s on the other side.”

The Paladin sneered, “There is nothing to prepare for. Ganr will judge you for every action, for every thought, you have ever had. In life he is a merciful understanding god.” The Paldin lifted his right hand into the air and clenched it into a fist while staring Ice down, “But that doesn’t concern you as you’re not long for this world.”

Ice nodded, ’OK. Good, I’ve got him talking. I can feel some of my energy coming back. If I can buy another…40 seconds I should stand a decent chance of creating enough distance to get away. But, it loks like he doesn’t really want to talk about this Ganr guy. Strange, I thought a zealot would be chomping at the bit to find a chance to preach a bit. O well, if I can’t appeal to piety I’ll try the tried and true, vanity.’

Ice spoke, “OK, fair enough I guess. But, please, one final indulgence. I’ve seen some very strange things as I’ve traveled across the stars, but this, this supposed immortality of yours…that takes the space cake. Please, do me a favor and just tell me how such a thing is even possible.”

The Paladin tossed his head back and laughed, he grinned wide displaying his immaculately white teeth. He spoke, “Well, I suppose there’s no harm in this. You certainly won’t be telling anyone else. As the great galactic war caused the galaxy to crack and crumble the Paladin order stood resolute in the face of chaos. We guarded the worlds under Avalon’s protection with unerring fealty and dedication. Such was our resolve that none of the great powers save Damaskia dared to challenge us, and even then only with sneak attacks and covert trickery. The single time they met a Paladin of the Order in battle, Rei, the commander of the Damaskian Forces fell. The treacherous leader of a rebellion on Namek known as ‘The Black Guard’ also met his end. The war had an ugly start but things were going well.”

‘YES! Just a few more seconds and I’ll at least have a chance to survive this! And… Ice suppressed the urge to smile, ‘It looks like he just launched into a full fledged monologue.’

A single tear fell down the Paladin’s noble face, “But then. Then the machines fell upon us. An unending swarm of automatons. The bravest of our order plunged into combat, trying to free the people of Earth from the mechanical menace. But, they all fell in battle. None could withstand the might of the machines. No matter how skilled with a blade my brothers were it simply did not matter. Cleave off a machines arms and legs? It keeps fighting. Stab it through the heart? Machines have no hearts. Even decapitating them did nothing to slow them down. The only way to get these machines to stop fighting was to obliterate them down to the very last atom.”

Another tear rolled down the Paladin’s somber face, “Our order prides itself on skill with the blade. Brute strength was needed to beat down these machines, for all our training our skill with the sword simply didn’t matter. Rendered all but useless we were relegated to the sidelines. We did our best to evacuate as many people as we could from Earth, but, the public’s faith in our ability to protect them was utterly shattered. As we Paladins stood on the sidelines the barbaric Saiyans destroyed nearly all of the machines. Who would think a race so savage would be the saving grace of the universe?”

The Paladin wiped the tears away from his face, he spoke more confident now, tones of pride creeping into his once sullen voice, “You see, once the war was over we decided that the order would need to remake itself. Build itself up to face any challenge that we might face. We learned how to become just as proficient in hand to hand combat as we were with our swords. We studied what footage could be recovered from the Saiyans fighting the control units of the Legion and we adopted some of their tactics. While brutal and completely lacking in finesse there simply is no denying the effectiveness of a well timed Ion Blast attack. And, finally, a select few from the order were chosen to receive blessings from Ganr himself.”

Ice’s eyes widened, “‘What!? Is he seriously claiming that a god actually made him immortal? That’s ridiculous! Isn’t it?

The Paldin kept talking, “After days of meditation my consciousness was pulled into a realm outside of both space and time. I had achieved oneness with Ganr. In that instant I understood all, I perceived all, I and god became a single consciousness. It felt like…no, words cannot describe. Regardless, when I returned to the mortal plane my strength had increased exponentially, my already prodigious skills with the blade were heightened to the stuff of legend, and, while it was never stated to me flat out I knew that while I could be harmed, broken and beaten I could never truly die in battle. You see, eleven other of my brethren also achieved oneness, but, their minds and bodies couldn’t withstand the experience. They all went mad or dropped into comatose states. I was able to perceive the almighty, for an instant become one with him, and, I theorize, that when I returned I maintained some of his divine power. So, now you know, what do you plan to do with this knowledge?”

Ice smiled, “Run the fuck away to be honest.” Ice raised both of his hands to his face, palms out with his fingers splayed outwards. He shouted, “Solar flare!” A blinding blast of light filled the battlefield scorching the unsuspecting Paladin’s retinas.

In the same instant the Paladin covered his eyes and screamed in pain Ice suppressed his power level to nearly zero and sprinted away on foot.




Ice looked at Belpepa and Ella, the looks of disbelief on both of their faces were obvious, even to Ice.

He spoke, “So as I surmised for you there’s this immortal Paladin chasing me down. I managed to get away from him and stow away on a ship. When I snuck off of the ship I found myself on this planet. Then I managed to…learn a few other things. But, anyway, that part really isn’t all that important.” Ice looked each of his friends in the eyes in turn, “I need to find these seven artifacts on Earth and use them to kill him in some way. Because that asshole is going to scour the galaxy looking for me, and I can’t live like that. Immortal or not if somebody is gonna get got it sure as shit isn’t gonna be me.”

Ella batted her eyes and spoke in a sarcastically cheery alto drawl, “Well, never a dull moment with you.”

Belpepa rubbed his hand across his forehead, “Well, when you said you needed a hand with something this isn’t quite exactly what I had in mind. The last thing I need is some immortal super powered Paladin who…and tell me if I’m wrong here…draws his strength directly from a god. Ya, I might need to duck out on this job. Because I well…value my own life.”

Ice spoke a single phrase, “Ringall 7, bounty hunters, your exact words, ‘ask me for any one favor’.”

Belpepa scowled, “Fuck it! Fair is fair. But I was really hoping you wouldn’t remember that.”

Ella traced a finger up and down Belpepa’s left arm, she spoke softly, “What’s a matter? Is our monkey boy actually afraid of something? That’ll be a first.”


Belpepa scoffed, “Scared, no. Smart? Yes.”

Ella glanced at the ceiling and resumed speaking, this time in a more mocking tone, “Well, there was that one time on Ord Gerral, and the other time on Malachor II, and I distinctly recall a rather embarrassing time we all had on Damaskia. I guess this wouldn’t be the first time you were scared on a job…more like the 85th time, sound about right?”

Belpepa glowered, “No comment.”

Ella laughed haughtily, “Well, we’ve all been there. Granted we all haven’t been there as much as you have. But, monkeys aren’t exactly known for their brains.”

Ice spoke up, “Enough. The metal discs I just handed you, those are radars.” Ice took his own dragon ball radar out and placed it on the table. He then pushed a button on the top of the disk to turn it on. He looked at Ella and then Belpepa, “This is a very special kind of radar. Its sole use is to find dragonballs. You see, each time these balls are used to make a wish they disburse across the world in random locations. It would take years, maybe even decades, to find these dragonballs without the radar.”


Ella and Belpepa each eyed their radars, wordlessly inspecting them.

Ella spoke up, “Well. I think I must be missing something. Either that or the knowledge of your imminent death at the hands of this immortal paladin are driving you insane.”

Ice spoke softly, “The dragonballs, assuming what I’ve learned about them is actually true, can grant any single wish that you can think of.”

Belpepa spat out a long stream of beer. Ella deftly moved to the left, avoiding the sickening spew. Belpepa shouted, “ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS! WHY ARE WE WASTING THE WISH ON GETTING RID OF THIS ONE GUY! WHY DON’T WE MAKE YOU IMMORTAL! WHY DON’T WE MAKE ALL THREE OF US IMMORTAL!?”

All of the bar’s patrons, who had finally gotten over the fact that there was an odd looking alien sitting among them, all turned towards Ice’s table.

One of the humans said, “Shit son, did I hear something bout…something bout immor tality!” This one had mispronounced immortality by placing an undue amount of emphasis on the m’s and o’s. While Ice was sorely tempted to respond that nobody deserved something if they couldn’t even properly say the thing that that they wanted…he didn’t want to draw even more attention to them. Another bar patron said, “Shiiiiit. I want to get double immortality!” Others in the crowd loudly agreed.

I swear, sometimes Belpepa can just be the dumbest little shit.

Ice spoke up, “Immortality? Ya that might be nice, if you could actually like…get it.” Ice stood up and pointed at Belpepa, “My friend here has just had a bit much to drink. He said that out in space they have real beer and that, and please don’t be offended, I am quoting him here, ‘That weak earth shit ain’t gonna do shit for this Saiyan Elite hombre! I learned to drink at the mother fucking pool when I was only six days old. Like a fucking boss to be quite fucking honest with you my honest as fucking honesty can get friend.’”

Ice looked around to see if the humans were buying it, a couple of them were grinning and nodding. A few of the more perceptive ones didn’t seem the least bit amused. Ice suppressed the urge to frown, ‘Shit, I need to sell this a bit harder. If this lot of humans actually believes Belpepa there’s a decent chance they’ll try to follow us around. Or tell their friends, who will then tell their friends, until first thing you know this little outburst is a headline story on the Inter Galatic News Network and the Paladin is breathing down my neck again. I AM GOING TO FUCKING MURDER BELPEPA! Wait…while I’m keeping my power level suppressed to the bare minimum I CAN’T murder him. A vein throbbed in the side of Ice’s head. It was the one outward sign that he wasn’t actually calm.

Ice pulled Belpepa to his feet. He shouted so all the room could hear him, “As you can see my friend bit of way more than he could chew.” Ice slammed his right hand forward into the side of Belpepa’s head, he had moved so fast that the human eye couldn’t possibly hope to follow it. When his hand reached the side of Belpepa’s head he gently, but firmly, buried the tip of his index finger into a particular point slightly above Belpepa’s eyeball and about an inch above his eyebrow. The expertly applied pressure caused Belpepa to lose control of his muscles for a brief moment. Belpepa staggered, nearly collapsing to the ground. Ice caught him, moving slowly this time so the rest of the bar could see.

Ice laughed and said, “OK, he’s had too much to drink. So much for earth beer not doing anything for him.” Ice then gently sat Belpap down into his seat. As ice set him down Ice softly whispered into Belpap’s ear, “Are you fucking insane! We don’t need the natives following us around. By some miracle they might actually beat us to a dragonball. But, they’ll almost certainly draw unwanted attention that could lead tht fucking Paladin right to us, or others who could actually give us trouble.” Ice pulled Belpepa closer to him, gripping the lapel of his shirt to hoist him forward a bit, “Use your head!” Ice released Belpepa’s shirt, causing him to rock backwards in a motion that closely mimicked human behavior while intoxicated.

Most of the bar’s patrons had keeled over laughing by now. Though one or two people still had their eyes locked on Ice and his comrades with an unnerving amount of focus and concentration.

Shit, learning all that anatomy proved helpful once again. But, I can’t shake the feeling that Belpepa might have just t let the cat out of the bag.

Ice glanced at Ella and nodded to the door. Ella nodded back. Together they stood up and picked up Belpepa. They each draped one of his arms over their shoulders and carried him out of the bar.

Once they got outside Ella spoke up, but in a very hushed tone, “I saw what you did there. Good move.”

Ice nodded and whispered back, “Well thanks. I’m not really looking forward to waking him up though. He might just blurt all that stuff out again.” Ice looked side long at Belpepa’s face, there was a large amount of droll running out of his mouth as he had gone completely slack jawed. “I am thinking he’s defeintely going to be pissed off. Ya, definitely pissed odd. Let’s try to get him into the wilderness or something so we can wake him up without risk of him blurting out our plans or blowing up a city.”

Ella nodded, she whispered back, “OK, I know a good place.” Ella glanced around to see if they were alone. They had ducked out of the bar and made their way through an alley. It appeared that they were the only three souls within earshot. Ella whispered, “OK, why don’t you sling him over your back or something and follow me.”

Ice nodded in the affirmative.

Ella took to the skies with Ice following close behind; Belpepa slung over Ice’s left shoulder.

***

They had arrived at Roshi’s island only a few hours after leaving the bar. Ice had explained to Ella that he needed to keep his power under wraps to avoid the Paladin finding him and that as a consequence he would be limited to an excruciatingly slow flying speed. Ella had understood, though she had given him grief all the way to Roshi’s in her own unique sarcasm laced way.

As soon as Roshi set eyes on Ella he welcomed Ice’s trio with open arms. Cheeks flushed, a bead of sweat running down his smooth forehead, Roshi greeted them, “Why hello there Ice! I see you were serious about getting me to train you!” Roshi looked Ella up and down stopping for a moment to stare at her shapely breasts. Roshi’s nose began to bleed profusely.

Ella turned to Ice, she didn’t look the least bit amused, in fact, she looked downright mad, “Ice, why is this simpleton ogling me?”

Ice smiled shyly, “Ella, as a human I thought you’d recognize one of the greatest human martial artists to ever live. This is Master Roshi. And…do you recall that scroll I was telling you about?”

Ella wearily eyed Master Roshi, she spoke to Ice out of the side of her mouth, “Ya, I remember. That would be a nice trick to have up your sleeve. Bet it saves a lot on gas money.”

Ice’s smile grew a bit bigger, “Well, this old leche….I mean. This Master of the martial arts holds the key to putting the technique to use.”

Ella turned to Ice, a look of absolute astonishment on here face, she said, “No! I thought you were having a hard time even reading the scroll because it was in an outdated dialect of a language you barely knew.”

Ice nodded, “Ya, it was a pain in the neck. But, I didn’t have much else to do cooped up in the cargo hold of a ship for days on end. If you ever need to get some reading done that’ll do the trick by the way. Though…I imagine there are more pleasant ways to go about getting some difficult reading done.”

Roshi was making a scene as Ice and Ella calmly talked. As Roshi collapsed to the ground, likely due to some minor stroke due to a sudden rush of blood away from his head, Turtle was on the move to perform CPR. Very slowly, because this is a fucking turtle to be honest. Ice interrupted Ella midsentence, “Excuse me Ella, one sec.”

Ice walked over to Roshi and gently, but firmly, performed a couple of quick chest compresions over his heart. The old man snapped to. Turtle was still quite a ways away from Roshi at this point. Ice whispered something into Roshi’s ear.

Roshi shouted, “I’M NOT GETTING LIFE ALERT! WHO IN THE HELL WOULD EVEN BE ABLE TO GET OUT HERE!?”

Ice walked back to Ella, he spoke, “Anyway Ella, this guy holds the key. You see I figured out how to perform the technique. I’ve been able to use it in very limited circumstances, moving a couple hundred feet at a time and what not. But, the problem is I don’t know how to ‘aim’ myself. Put another way, this technique normally works by locking onto someone’s energy signature and then teleporting to the energy signature. This should be doable with a scouter, but, mine was destroyed by that Palain on Yairdrat, and I doubt I’d be too precise working with that thing.”

Ella sighed, “What are you getting at?”

Ice replied, “That one can teach people how to sense the energy of others. Not just that, he can teach people to recognize how energy feels. Basically if you and Belpepa were of even strength Roshi would be able to tell you apart because of personal quirks in your energies since your energy is unique to you. It’s actually a lot like a fingerprint, everyone has them, but they’re all unique.”

Roshi was salivating as he sat on the sand beach of Kame House.

Ella glanced over at Roshi nervously, she spoke slowly, tentatively, as if she felt like she could and would receive bad news at any moment, “So…Why hasn’t he taught you how to do this yet.”

Ice couldn’t maintain eye contact with Ella, he cleared his throat and looked down at the ground, “He uh…he wanted me to bring him a pretty girl to walk around the beach with him a few times. Then he’s teach me how to sense energy and anything else I want to know.”


Even with the summer sun relentlessly beating down on him Ice could feel the air grow hotter as rage broiled off of Ella. She snapped at Ice, “Walk around the beach? What in the shit does that even mean? This beach is like…” Ella looked around at the beach, “really small! What exactly does, ‘walking around the beach’ even mean?” She said, her voice becoming ever more shrill.

Roshi’s nose began to bleed a little. He fell down back into the sand of his island. Turtle resumed its epically slow march to save his friend.

Despite needing to get going on this dragonball hunt Ice laughed a bit. Ella’s usual carefree sarcastic demeanor had slipped…no…cracked. Ice allowed himself a small smile, he spoke in a whisper, “Ya, as you’ve surmised this old man is…hmm…there’s really no other way to put it…a perv. But, he’s also pretty pitiful. If you were to just…I don’t know…hold hands with him, walk around the beach, maybe give him a little kiss. Ya, he’d be head over heels.”

Ella hissed back, “NO WAY!”

Ice shook his head, he said, “Look, I don’t like it anymore than you do. But, this will only take a minute and once I learn how to just sense energy I’ll be able to put that teleporting technique to use. If we send you and Belpepa in different directions to gather the dragonballs I can teleport between the two of you, saving an immense amount of time.”

Ella snarled a bit, her brow furrowed, her checks were flushing to match her crimson red hair. She let out a deep breath of air. “That is a good point. But, ugh. If I do this you had better teach that technique to me.”

Ice nodded, “Sure, it may take a bit, but that’s the least I can do for your help.” Ice extended his hand towards Ella. Ella reluctantly reached out and shook it. She took a deep breath, and turned to face Master Roshi, she spoke shyly, “I’m ready for that walk around the beach now.”

***

“So, you’re telling me I need to…” Ice furrowed his brow, he had been at this sensing energy business with Master Roshi for twenty minutes now and he had made very little progress. The Changeling’s anger mounted, ‘Is is even possible to sense a person’s energy? Was this old man just pulling my leg so he could perv on my friend? I don’t have time for this…that fucking Paladin could show up at any moment.’ He took in a deep breath and then exhaled slowly, ‘No, no it’s definitely possible to do this. Scouters can read a precise power level for a person, so it’s not out of the question that someone or something could do it in nature. And, the Paladin told me he sensed me from across the stars. People can do this. Though I don’t know that Roshi can actually teach people to do it. I still might have been played. Urg, god dammit.’

Ice snarled, “Stop playing games, we’ve been at this for nearly half an hour and we have nothing to show for it. Now can you please just tell me how to do this!?”

Roshi and Ice had been sitting on the edge of the beach at Kame House, the ocean tide gently lapping against their outstretched feet. Roshi smiled coyly, “Ice, this isn’t like…learning how to throw a punch or a kick. This is something more. It will come to you in time if you just relax and open yourself to everything around us.”

Ice glanced around, as far as he could see the only people for hundreds of miles were himself and Roshi. ‘Is this old man out of his fucking mind? There’s nothing here. There is literally nothing here.’

A sand crab scuttled across the beach and came to rest on Ice’s right knee. He looked at the crustacean contemptuously as he brushed it off of him into the sea. Ice closed his eyes and tried to concentrate.

“Why…why did you that?” Ice opened his eyes. ‘Why does the old man care if I brushed a crab off of my arm? Ice replied tersely, “Well. It was in my space. I didn’t appreciate it crawling all over me like that. What’s it to you though?”

Roshi’s demeanor became unusally serious, there was a moment of silence broken only by the gentle lapping of the waves against the sand beach. Then, Roshi said, “How does the crab feel?”

“What do you mean, ‘how does it feel’? It doesn’t feel. It’s a crab.” Ice was starting to wonder if he was the subject of some elaborate practical joke on the part of the human. He liked to laugh as much as the next guy, but, there really was a time and a place for these things.

Roshi laid his hand down on the beach. The ruby red crustacean Ice had callously brushed aside skittered up Roshi’s arm and came to rest on his shoulder, kind of like a parrot.

‘Well, I did know that this fellow was an odd one, but, wow.

Roshi spoke again, “Close your eyes.”

Ice replied, “Why?”

Roshi replied, “I thought you wanted to learn this technique. Now, please, do as I say and close your eyes.”

Ice replied, “Fair enough.” The Changeling then closed his eyes.

Roshi spoke, “Good, good. Now, tell me, what do you see?”

He has got to be fucking with me. I don’t see anything, how could I when my eyes are closed!” Barely suppressing the urge to grumble Ice replied in as calm a tone as he could muster, “ I don’t see anything, nothing but blackness.”

Roshi replied, “I suspected as much. Now, tell me Ice, what’s on your mind?”

Ice laughed derisively, “Hmm. Where to begin? I have a Paladin chasing me across the galaxy. Normally that really wouldn’t be a problem, but, he can sense my energy from across the universe and is probably able to use the Instant Transmision technique so he might pop by at literally any given moment unless I keep my power under wraps. In my first fight with him it was tough but I did manage to burn him to ashes. Of course then he regenerated his entire body because, surprise, the asshole is immortal thanks to some asshole of a god.

I’ve got the usual family drama. Money troubles. And I also have a toothace.” Ice opened his eyes and glared at the human, “What’s it to you?”

Roshi smiled faintly, “There, that’s your problem, clear your mind. Clear your mind and close your eyes. When you sit and are fully aware without hearing, seeing or thinking, that is when you will learn.”

‘Is he serious? I don’t go in for this new age shit. But, what do I have to lose?’

Ice closed his eyes and attempted to clear his mind.

WC: 10,188
http://www.alexsdbzrpg.info/page/Lord+Ice

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